Engage Your Community with Benita

Adorned Abode is the place to go when a daughter is having a birthday, or a friend is going away on a year long trip abroad, or when you just need a wholesome pick-me-up after a bad day. The shop owner, Benita Smith, has a strong presence in both the community of Tacoma (south of Seattle) where her shop is located, and online where she advocates for community-building and the Black Lives Matter movement. 

Small businesses are all busy trying to create safe spaces for their employees and customers alike, but Benita graciously set aside time to have a chat with me. We discuss her move from the Midwest, challenges of being a woman of color, and how to better connect with our community.

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On The Shop

I like to think of my community now like a big circle where we call over and beckon others searching for community and we welcome them into the circle.

Suzi: Hi Benita! Firstly, your store is so welcoming, it looks like a cozy home! Most stores want to provide a great “customer experience”, but it seems like you really want to connect with them like they’re family. I know you’re from the Midwest, so was it a little shocking to come to the PNW and experience the “Seattle freeze”?  

Benita: My husband brought me up to Washington during the glorious summer of 1999. I was sold on the beauty, the nature and unique businesses you’ll only find here. I’m not formally trained in business or merchandising so my store can have a novice approach with quality offerings and a big personality. I feel that is what resonates with my community. 

I quickly learned that Washington is a place where you find your community and you hold on tight. I like to think of my community now like a big circle where we call over and beckon others searching for community and we welcome them into the circle.

Suzi: As a Washingtonian, that makes me happy. More specifically to your products, what is personally your favorite item you sell in the store, and why?

Benita: It’s hard to pick one thing because they all tend to be my favorite things. If I had to pick right now I would say it’s our wooden wick candle line by Sweet Grass Trading Company. A colleage of mine asked about where I was sourcing my sage from. With this prompt it challenged me to ask myself, where I’m sourcing from a good resource, am I sourcing from my BEST resource. I could do better. This led me to an amazing line that carried wooded wick candles that I had been searching for. It also reminded me of the  integrity that comes along with the responsibility of owning a business and having a platform to uplift others. 

Honorable mention of a favorite product would have to be our greeting cards. My mother-in-law always loved cards, and always had the perfect card for an occasion. There are so many beautiful card makers and cards resonate with people deeply. As a store where sentiment and gift giving are the heart of our mission, this will probably be the one area I’ve grown to love the most. All of our cards and candles are made in the states.

Suzi: Why is it so important to you that you mostly sell locally made items?  

Benita: I sell merchandise from all over, local, made in USA, fair trade and some mass produced. I will try to do less and less mass produced in my business model going forward. I will say that the more local you buy, the better it is for the local economy. The dollar stays in the community longer. 

If you buy a meal from a small local business that money is going to stay within the community longer and likely better sourced ingredients than if you dine in a chain establishment. I have just recently brought in 2 new local greeting card lines. 

On Community, Online and In-Person

If you read a story about a person’s unfortunate experience, chances are you are going to have empathy for others and understand their experiences and responses better. 

Suzi: You’re also so active on your instagram @adornedabode. Is it important to connect with people online, just as much as in person?

Benita: Absolutely! I’m an introvert extrovert. I think most people would think I’m a total extrovert. Social media allows you to connect in your own space in your own way. I love knowing who my community is and letting them know who I am. If their kiddo got an award I know, I somebody got married, I know, If someone participated in activism, I know.

You’re always communicating with me, the person, the real person behind the business on instagram. Social also allows me to help connect people together. I’m always happy to answer questions and support others. 

Suzi: We all appreciate when we can communicate with someone who actually cares about us, rather than an instagram bot. 

We’ve all seen the resurgence of the BLM movement for the last few months. How has it affected you personally, and your store?

Benita: To explain how I was personally affected, it was deep. Lots of sadness and sorrow. I experienced a lack of appetite and a total routine change in sleep, restlessness. Much of that has subsided now. I”m thankful to be out of that particular draining space. I’m in a place now where taking action brings me more joy.  One has to move beyond the spaces that hold you back, not listen to the negativity, reject it. Constantly rise above the challenges. 

I feel like people are starting to understand themselves more, take up space, and lead. I also feel like an understanding is starting to come from allies in the community that equity and inclusion with thoughtful actions and positive impacts are essential to progress and peace for all. I think people are starting to understand the work is long and hard, I’m a super upbeat person with an overall positive outlook. 

In regards to the business it was warming to have so many new people find my business and take notice of our place in the community. I’ve alway said my shop has something for everyone. I have received so many referrals and inquiries. I hope that these will become lasting relationships. 

Suzi: I’m so glad you’re in a healthier position now, and that you saw the positive sides- as in the community coming together. Can you tell us some tips on how to better connect with our own neighborhood community? Especially in this time of seemingly great division?

Benita: I think the best way to better connect with our community in this time of divisiveness is for people to EDUCATE themselves and become well informed from RELIABLE sources. Learn about the LGBTQ+ community, people with disabilities and people of color. When we all know more we do better. When we all learn and understand our histories we begin to learn how we got here. If you read a story about a person’s unfortunate experience, chances are you are going to have empathy for others and understand their experiences and responses better. 

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I think the other thing people can do is stand up to bullies and advocate for people. Do this in private, do this in public settings. Systems of oppression breed in environments where others are afraid to speak up. It’s not easy nor glamorous but standing up to bullies never is. However it is essential to healthy and safe communities. One of the active ways I challenged myself to this is I diversified my Instagram feed. Upon self examination I could be following even more well informed people. Many who provide resources. 

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We encourage everyone here and abroad to educate themselves on the history and oppression of Black people in the US. Through learning, we can connect with and understand one another on a deeper level, and be closer to our communities. 

Please consider supporting Black owned businesses, as we will. Not just for a few months, but actively for the rest of our lives. If you’re ever in need of warm stationary, candles, home decor – or just a welcoming conversation with Benita – head over to Adorned Abode in Tacoma, WA!